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Bombing the Moon was just warmup: NASA at it again

November 3, 2009

The ever thrifty and reasonable folks at NASA have hatched a new plan on the heels of bombing the moon. This newest plan involves irradiating monkeys.

NASA is to expose squirrel monkeys to daily radiation doses to help them understand the effects of long space trips on humans.

[Is this poorly written or do monkeys need to understand space travel’s effects on humans? And how will radiation poisoning help that?]

The researchers are to pay particular attention to the effects on the monkeys’ central nervous systems and behaviour. The monkeys, previously trained to perform a variety of tasks, will be tested to see how the exposure affects their performance.

Here are your official Underdog Soldier predictions:

1. Radiation will prove to be bad for monkeys.
2. Radiation will impair the monkeys’ abilities to perform tasks

Finally, is NASA taking cues from The Onion?

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One Comment leave one →
  1. society's pliers permalink
    November 3, 2009 9:11 pm

    This should have been a chapter in Gulliver’s Travels. I think NASA stole this research from the Grand Academy.

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